


The Trans Boy Jesse Backstory Fic No One Knew They Wanted Or Needed

by mXrtis



Category: Breaking Bad
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-10
Updated: 2015-06-10
Packaged: 2018-04-03 19:29:43
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,134
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4112347
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mXrtis/pseuds/mXrtis
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>So basically this is just a backstory for the canon events where pretty much everything is the same except Jesse Pinkman is a trans boy who was kicked out of his parents house when he was 16. <br/>Right now it's looking to have about 12 chapters but I may combine a few and it's possible I'll just give up like I did w/ my last big fic. *casually kicks mcr vampire au under the rug* But hey, I'm pretty inspired right now and I just wrote a chapter in a day.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Trans Boy Jesse Backstory Fic No One Knew They Wanted Or Needed

The night Jesse came out was a Family Dinner Night. Every night was Family Dinner Night in the Pinkman household because Family Dinner Night was a codename for “Let’s Bitch At Jesse Because He Couldn’t Learn To Read When He Was Like Fuckin’ Three Years Old”. The words burned in his throat and he stared at his mother trying to cut her dry steak.

“Uh, Mom, Dad, I’m- uh -I’m transgender.” He winced, his mother stopped mid cut with her dull knife. She raised one eyebrow and let out a sound of questioning.

“I’m a boy.”

“That’s nice, sweetie.” She set back to cutting the steak with increased determination. His father didn’t speak.

* * *

 

Neither of Jesse’s parents brought it up again. He noticed the stares from his mother and how his father became more distant. He noticed how his mother quietly deflected him from pants in the store and started only letting him get an inch off his hair at any given hair cut. He noticed how they tiptoed around him and how Family Dinner Nights became Awkwardly Staring At Each Other Nights. He never tried to bring it up again and hoped he didn’t fuck himself over too badly this time.

* * *

 

Jesse placed a tablet of ritalin on his tongue, then a second one, and a third one. He swallowed them dry and winced against the bitter taste.

“My parents are fuckin pissed at me.”

Ainsley took the bottle from him and poured a few pills into her hands, “Did they find your weed again?”

“Nah.”

“Then what’dya do?”

He messed with the loose seam at the bottom of his shirt, “Shit. Uh… Fuck.”

“C’mon, what didya do? Kill someone?”

“You promise you won’t tell anyone, like not at school, right?”

“Shit girl, what did you do? You’re fuckin scaring me.”

“Yeah…… about that. I’m kind of… not a girl?”

Jesse held his breath, staying still on the edge of Ainsley’s bed; Ainsley leaned back on the bed.

He took a deep breath, “I told them that.”

Ainsley didn’t reply. The room stayed silent for what felt like hours. Then, she jumped up off of the bed.

“Let’s go to 7-11 and BUY EVERYTHING.”

“Dude, A, we’re fuckin broke. We spent all our money on the ritalin.”

“Let’s go to 7-11 and STEAL EVERYTHING.”

“I’m game.”

* * *

 

Ainsley sat on top of the bathroom counter, toothbrush hanging slightly out of her mouth. Jesse held his hair up behind him. She hopped off the counter and grabbed his hair to wrap a hairband around it. She let the loose pony tail drop.

“You’ll look good with short hair.”

“Yeah?”

“Of course, man,” She laughed and wandered out into her room; Jesse followed.

Ainsley flopped down onto her bed, “M’gonsleep.”

“A-am I still like, _allowed_ to sleep in bed with you??”

“F’course Jess, you’re mbesfrien.” Jesse let out a sigh and slipped his pants off. He climbed up on the bed and pulled the covers over both of them. Ainsley wrapped her hand around his and squeezed hard.

“You’re gonna be okay one day, I can feel it.”

Jesse pressed his forehead into the space between her neck and her shoulder, “Ya really think so?”

“Course, you made it this far with your fucked up parents all on your case.” She leaned her head against his, “Really wanna sleep though…”

“Okay.” Jesse stayed there with his head resting against Ainsley until he heard her breathing quietly, slowly.

* * *

 

Ainsley dropped Jesse off outside of his house. He slung his bag over his back, letting the other strap hang free. He walked leisurely up to the door and tried the doorknob. It stuck. He unhooked his keychain from his backpack and tried it on the door. The doorknob stayed stuck. He pounded against the door.

“Hey, Mom, the door’s locked and my key won’t work. Can ya let me in?”

No answer.

He slammed his fist against the door.

“HEY MOM, WHAT THE FUCK.”

He kicked the door.

“MOM? DAD? SOMEONE LET ME IN.”  
He slammed all of his weight against the door.

“WHAT THE FUCK.”

The doorknob turned and the door opened slightly, stopped by a chain. His mother stood on the other side.

“We changed the locks, please leave us alone before we have to call the police.” She shut the door quickly, one concise motion. Jesse ran at the door.

“NO. NO. NO. WHAT THE FUCK. YOU CAN’T DO THIS TO ME.”

His mother pulled the blinds on the window on the top of the door.

“NO. NO. NO. WHERE WILL I GO? I DON’T HAVE ANYONE, I DON’T HAVE _ANYTHING_.”

He turned around and slid down the door, “I DON’T HAVE ANYTHING, DO YOU HEAR ME, NOTHING.” He tried to speak again and choked on the weight in his throat.

“No…. no. This CAN’T BE HAPPENING, YOU CAN’T DO THIS TO ME.” He leaned forward, touching his forehead to the tips of his knees, and felt hot tears on his cheeks.

An hour later he stood up on shaky legs and moved over to the swinging bench on the front porch and laid down.

* * *

 

Jesse woke up with a start. His mother shook his shoulders roughly. She frowned and whispered loudly, “I told you to get out of here! Your father is on the phone with the authorities right now. This isn’t your place of residence and you’re trespassing.” Jesse jumped up and pushed past her, grabbing his backpack on the way.

* * *

 

Jesse unzipped the smaller pocket of his backpack and rifled through its contents looking for a couple of quarters. He fed them into the pay phone and dialed Ainsley’s number.

“Who the fuck is this? Do you KNOW what TIME it is?”

“Yeah, uh, Ains, it’s me.”

“Jesse?”

“Yep.” He laughed slightly, voice cracking.

“You okay?”

“Haha, not really.” He ran a hand through his hair, pushing it out of his eyes

“What happened?”

“Well, I’m kind of homeless now,” he laughed again, quick and manic, “And all of my shit’s locked in the house.”

“Really? Holy shit. I’d say you could crash here, but you really can’t… My parents don’t really like you.”

“Well they’re not the only ones.”

“Uh… Anyway, do you have somewhere to go?”

“Probably Albequerque, it’s close and I know a guy there.”

“But I mean, like, tonight.”

“It’s pretty warm, but I don’t know if I could get away with sleeping outside. I’ll probably go to K-Mart or something, they’re open like all the time, aren’t they?”

“Okay,” Ainsley inhaled deeply, “Jess?”

“Yeah?”

“Be safe.”

“I’ll try.”

“I mean it, if you die on the streets I’ll kick your fucking ass.”

“I’ve made it this long, haven’t I?” He laughed softly. The call cut off. Jesse zipped his backpack up and wandered off down the road.

**Author's Note:**

> Sooooo, Chapter 1 is done, pacing should get better soon, this chapter was mostly just exposition. I have the whole plot planned out rn and will probably try to post Chapter 2 next week. Unfortunately, Ainsley isn't going to become a main character, but I am oddly attached to her.


End file.
